You know you are old when……

 

You know you are old when you can’t hear the thermometer beep

You know you are old when your trophy  wife applies for social security

You know you are old when you create a folder to keep the obituaries of your friends

You know you are old when you are stiff in all the wrong places.

You know you are old when the president of the United States is young enough to be your child.

You know you are old when your grandson looks you up on Wikipedia.

You know you are old when people younger than your children are running for president of the USA.

You know you are old when you can not hold your phone still long enough to tweet a photo of your junk.

You know you are old when your friends trade in their headphones for hearing aids.

You know you are old when having a massage, you are more worried that you will fart then you are about getting an erection

You know you are old when you find Nancy Pelosi sexy.

You know you are old when you congratulate a former girl friend on becoming a great grandmother.

You know your old when your kids are on the latest social media site before you even heard of it.

You know you are old when your grandson drives and you don’t.

You know you are old when you carry this in your wallet in the same place you carried a condom when you were young.

Whats in your wallet

14 thoughts on “You know you are old when……

  1. when every one you knew in your twenties is historic… all your music is classic… everything you remember no one else can … all your atlases are out of date … half your lps are mono …

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    • You know, I’ve thought for a time I really should. My Biographica Musicalia from 1960-1969 (maybe include 2-70) few people would believe or understand the volume and variety of music I lived, From deepest Furtwangler German to the middle of the scene here. I was not famous but several of my friends I lived with and went to school with are downright historic. We heard everybody. I’m also the Maternal grandther of the Early music society of San Francisco . Ask Holly. Our musical relationship was really deep. Treasurable singing together.

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  2. You know you are old when you start worrying whether you are old. When i was 25 years old my favorite aunt turned 50 – although she was really looking great i teased her about now turning old. Her reply stayed with me since then: “YOU will also turn 50 one day – but only if you are lucky!!!”. I think that is true for any age.

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  3. You know you are old, when you look back and see a magnificent story and are proud to have actually lived that story. I’m forty and I want to be a proud elder, but I see a self conscienceless about the age in your blog’s name and the cover photo. I would prefer a photo of a very very experienced and strong man who has lived through good and bad and survived all. One who has seen the fruits of his doings. One who was fortunate enough that he is living a life worth living, a life meaning something, a life worth telling.

    I’m sorry but the photo is of a man who has missed the opportunities and regrets the ol’ days shamelessly spent instead of doing something meaningful. One who is shivering of cold instead of enjoying the great boat ride. Please don’t take offence, I can feel you are not that kind of a person, and you are a hero for my generation with all your achievements and experience, which I cannot even come close to having myself, but the photo and the quote “69 year old boy” just misleads the reader. Feel free to ignore or delete my post, and I’m sorry if what I have written is inconsiderate. I don’t mean it.

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  4. Serdar, thank you for your thoughtful email. I changed my photo. I mostly write for my friends although now I have many followers like you, that I do not know. I like to poke fun at myself as well as pat myself on the back for the things I have done. Anyway, you have encourage me to write a post about what I mean by “a 69 year old boy”. So look for that sometime in the next few weeks. I am way behind on a few posts I want to do first.

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  5. My Aunt who is in her 80’s said: the first stage of senility is when you can’t remember someone’s name. The second when you don’t recognize the face. The third when you forget to zip up your pants. The fourth when you forget to unzip them!

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  6. old I felt today, when an inner impulse made me search on internet for an old common friend, Moshe Barone, I had no news from for almost 40 years, and then found out he passed away a couple of weeks ago. The good thing: I ran into your blog and have the pleasure to appreciate the acuteness of your train of thought, familiar from the good old days.

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