I have started to write music again. The last time, I composed was about twenty years ago. Then like now, I used a computer to help me although the technology has advanced so much during that time, it is hard to compare. I stop writing because it took more of a kind of concentration that I found difficult having a young family and a demanding job. So when I stopped, I made a promise to myself that someday when my life situation changed and I could put in the time and energy to compose, I would. For many years, I have been thinking of that promise and what my responsibilities are today to the person I was then. I guess that promise was not enough to get me back to writing or maybe it was the fear that even without the demands of a busy life, I still would not find the will and the talent. Now I have started maybe out of fear that the time is now. The time to explore the internal side of myself; to do things that do not involve effecting the actions of other either through power or influence. When I was a child, I was very ill with childhood asthma. At one time I was put into a covalence home for about a year. I was pretty much along most of the time and just seven years old. But I was not bored. I went into my own mind and created worlds there. In many ways it was an awesome experience. I guess people that meditate have such experiences. I am not sure. I do not meditate. Our minds are like the earth where all the action that we observe happen on the surface. When I write music or just improvise I get to go below the surface. It is sweet. You can listen to a bit of it here.
Avram – I love it. I don’t know you as this musical guy – but every time you share i feel a little more connected. you don’t know me as a musical guy either, but i have begun writing again as well (as a youngster i wrote a lot of chamber music – string quartets mostly) – but man it’s nice to be writing again. i enjoy it. it’s one of the only things that keeps me ‘present’.
Thanks for sharing!